Lifestyle, Misc, Portsmouth Life

No Phone: No Problems?

So, last Thursday, the worst happened.

I was indulging myself in an evening of ‘me time’ as a reward for a good gym sesh. I was buzzing; dancing around the kitchen and belting out ‘spice up your life!’ to my Dad while he sat watching TV.

I thought a bath would be the icing on top of a very good day.

I thought wrong.

I settled in amongst a sea of ‘pomegranate and peony’ scented bubbles. I really like to make the most of bath-time. I at least go in armed with a cup of tea and a good book, or at most, as in this case, with bubbles, incense, a Uni-textbook, some crackers and – alas – my phone.

I was just basking in my own good fortune and how lovely the day had turned out to be, when I knocked my tray of crackers off of the side of the bath. Naturally, I quickly dove out after them, because food. I actually managed to salvage the majority. I got back into the bath and all was briefly well. Then I thought ‘oh I’ll just go on my phone’ simultaneously with the wondering of ‘huh, what’s that knocking against my leg?’.

I’m sure you can imagine the rest. If you can’t, I remember it as a depressing montage of splashing, flailing limbs, uncooked rice and my Dad wetting himself with I-told-you-so laughter as he sang back to me ‘PEOPLE OF THE WORLD- SPICE UP YOUR LIFE!’.

It was a bit less than awesome.

That was a week and a half ago, and contrary to popular expectations, I have not died.

I’ve always tried not to be a total phone addict. I would welcome phone signal black holes, especially when travelling, as a time to just be a bit anonymous. I also really hate it when I’m hanging out with people and they are on their phones the whole time, I think it is the epitome of rude, but of course, I must do it sometimes too.  Phones are just so enthralling. Almost every piece of information about everything and everyone is right there at your fingertips, it can be ridiculously addictive.

But is it necessary?

I mean there have been some definite downsides: anyone who didn’t see the standard ‘phone’s broken, message me on here’ Facebook status, must think that I am just the worst most ignorant person.

However, the very same status has set me a little bit free from a whole world of instant messenger obligation. I’ve always been a dreadful replier, my scatterbrain decides to reply ‘later’ which sometimes ends up as never. But now that I don’t even get the texts there’s no pressure to reply is there?! But when I do actually choose to go online and sign into messenger, I’m there and I’m present and I actually do reply! Plus it is such a throwback to being fourteen and hunched over the teenage sensation that was MSN.

Although, another con, I am SO far behind in my group chats that when I sign on there is such a lot of scrolling before I can actually even reply to anything!

But the way I communicate has just become so different and old school, like, people call me on the house phone, mental right?!?

The convenience of the iPhone is what I feel the biggest loss of. I can’t just pull the train times right out of my pocket, I can’t call a safe and reliable Uber home, I can’t do any banking, I can’t listen to music on the go, or do some basic maths which I really shouldn’t need a calculator for anyway! Etc. Etc.

But like I said, it hasn’t killed me. I just have to be a bit more deliberate in my actions.

Whilst I have enjoyed an old school lack of connectivity, I still would not be averse to the offer of a new phone…

If you’ve got a spare one…

Just sayin’…


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